Happy Thanksgiving!

Thanksgiving

What a concept-a day when we are supposed to stop our daily routines, give thanks to God, recognize our blessings and share with others. What a wonderful idea! We start days in advance to make sure that everyone’s stomach is overflowing. We invite relatives that we see once a year or at funerals and sit in traffic for hours on the way to grandmas house. Supermarkets are more crowded than Penn station (NYC) at rush hour!

So, we spend a sleepless night on Wednesday, spend hours cooking and cleaning and then sink into a food coma until we pull out the sale ads to begin the Christmas season at 3 AM the next morning. We wind up being too busy and then too tired to really be thankful. Been there, done that. I will never forget the first Thanksgiving that my wife, Claire, and I, were married. She worked hard on baking special pecan pies. They were beautiful and she was so proud of them. Loading them into the car, we blissfully set out to grandmas house. Unfortunately, I had to hit the brakes and those perfect pies, which were sitting on the backseat, went flying to adorn the floor and the back of our seats. Maybe it was the Thanksgiving when we traveled to New York City and what was a 3 hour drive turned into an eight hour nightmare. Thankfulness somehow didn’t make it too high on the agenda those years.

The problem with Thanksgiving is that we try to bundle a years worth of gratefulness into a few hours. Sure, we might be able to pick out a few of the highlights but that’s about it. We need to celebrate this holiday throughout the year. Research continues to show that a person who practices gratitude does better mentally and physically. They tend to have more meaningful relationships and have a much more positive outlook about their lives. Their families are stronger and the children do better.

We all have our wants: the new car, the house with an entertainment center that can fit the 70-inch TV. That’s okay, but the thing that I came to realize is that it is never possible to fill wants. Once you get what you aimed for, you want more, the newer car, the bigger house, and the fancier gadgets. Sooner or later, you realize that it is impossible to ever fill all of your wants. However, it is possible to appreciate your blessings. One leads to frustration, the other to peace.

I witnessed the most incredible example of thankfulness that I’ve ever seen last year when I attended a wedding in the park. 90% of the people who were invited were the homeless and mentally ill that the bride and groom had worked with in their ministry. In fact, they had met each other in that ministry and wanted to show their thanks. I have to admit that night stretched my comfort zone. People that were my clients were now my fellow guests. I wondered what these folks had to be thankful for, how could they be celebrating? That is when I learned my lesson.

Among the guests was an elderly blind man. Disheveled, and clearly in need of a shower, he was being helped by both his fellow homeless and those in the wedding party. As he sat on the edge of the stage, the music started playing and he began to sway with the melody. He started to smile and that smile grew bigger as he enjoyed the food, the companionship, and the fact that he was being treated like a human being. I have never seen such gratitude over a bowl of ice cream. As I looked around, I realized that he was not alone. People that I would’ve never expected to be grateful were filled with an incredible appreciation of the moment.

They shared a gift with me, the gift of being able to feel gratitude in the moment. We need to pass that lesson on to our children. How often have our children heard us complain about our lives? There is never enough money or time to be joyful. We will be happy when…fill in the blank. We spend so much time thinking of what we need to get before we are thankful, that we forget what we have to be thankful about.

I propose that this year we make thankfulness a daily event. Let’s take one meal a week and call it our thankfulness meal. Everyone can report on what they felt grateful for over the last week. Maybe it was that absolutely perfect cup of coffee or doing something special with a loved one. Keep a daily diary of what you are grateful for and then, once week share it with each other. I guarantee that it will make a difference in your entire family.

HAPPY 52 THANKFULLNESS MEALS